Marketers Run Wild – Molson Coors Animee

Molson Coors’ Animee is the new beer in town (at least a few towns in the United Kingdom). 

The four main ingredients in beer are barley, hops, water and yeast.  Looking at these beers, one has to wonder if they should even be called beer.  As these seem to be flavored, then there would be little need for hops.  They seem to be completely clear, so it would make you wonder if there was actually any barley used in the making. 

Let’s have a look at the yummy flavors.
Clear Filtered – Funny, the bottle of water I am drinking right this moment is the same flavor.

Crisp Rose     – That reminds me, I need to take my Molson Coors’ Animee Clear Filtered and refresh the rose bushes out front.  Really, Rose? “Yeah, give one of them there Rose beers, no glass!”

Zesty Lemon    – Are they making beer or salmon steak.  Aside from the fact that the Germans have been making beer with lemon for centuries, what makes them believe that women would want to drink something in a bar that makes them pucker up.  Sort of a catch 22.

But wait, there’s more.  According to Miller Coors, this beer is “less gassy”.  So are they calling all other beers “bloat” beers.  In an attempt to help out Miller Coors, I have come up with a few slogans they can use in their advertising:

“Belly up to the bar”
“Does this beer make me look fat? Not this beer”
“Don’t worry, you’ll pee so much you won’t have time to bloat”
“No Beer Farts”

There you have it.  The newest entry from the creative minds of some marketing department deep in the bowels of a clueless brewery.  Instead of creating advertising that show women and their existing beers selection in a favorable light, they’ve decided to just target an infinitesimal segment of the beer buying public.